I’m writing this post just to give everyone a brief intro on the folks who’ve decided to take on the mantle of 2017 Intramural Open Coach. Without further ado, here they are:

Melissa “I like high kicks and spirit fingers” Wright:

In case you haven’t been in class with this lovely lady, Melissa loves to finish off every set of deadlifts, or kettle bell swings, or box jumps, or pull-ups, or toes to bar, or box jumps, or…really ANY movement, with a high kick. This is a throwback to her cheerleading days. When she gets REALLY excited, she does the special “Double Kick into Spirit Fingers” move. Its quite captivating for sure. She loves to squat and came to tears when I offered up a captain spot to her. Melissa, we are SO PUMPED that you’re a captain this year.

Lydia “the Latin Lifter” Parra:

Barbells beware – if loaded with an obscene amount of weight, Lydia will surely snatch or clean and jerk you! And then after three white lights, she’s been known to salsa right back to her chair and await her next lift. She brings to the table a fun appetite for competition and pun-filled shirts (Shrug Life, anyone?), so beware of the shenanigans the will likely follow her and her squad. For this team, I foresee lots of extra sessions at her fully outfitted garage gym. They have jerk blocks people! Jerk blocks that don’t fall apart when you have more than 20 kilos on the bar! Plus, she’s got hubby Eddie as a sidekick…Lydia, please keep him in check.

Andrew “the Artistic Assassin” Edlund:

Everyone knows that Andrew just loves anything to do with rowing. Long walks on the beach with his sweetheart? Well, only if that sweetheart is the rower he’s always pulling behind him. Sorry Jessica, its true. He’s the only one I know that carries a rower in the back of his car. Seriously, go look in his back seat right now. What you may not know is that Andrew has a very spicy side to him – just for kicks, to make a 2k row a bit more challenging, he hops off and frames jerseys and does some woodworking…and still finishes with a sub-7 time. He may be quiet in speech, but man he can make an erg scream…And don’t get me started on the shelter he asked about building out back of CFG for all the abandoned rowers (I mean ergs) he finds on the streets. For the sake of his sanity, I sure hope this team wins any workout with rowing in it!

Rob “the Neon Sausage” Rivera:

The man, the myth, the legend. The State Champ! The dude in your grill (pun intended) with a lens when you are making the ugliest faces you never even knew were possible. Did you know he sends me WAY MORE embarrassing pictures of you all that don’t ever make their way to Facebook? With a wardrobe and sense of humor as bright as his personality, Rob never lets a second slip by without reminding me about how little my calves are. Or how bald I am. Those who end up on his team beware – you will ALL have nicknames by the end of day 1. If you don’t, its because he doesn’t like you. Some of my all-time favorite nicknames – Biscuit, Millhouse, and Muffin Top.